Again

I think I meet her again. The person i really waited for the longest time of my life. She seems to be very pretty, quite simple and truly cheerful. I know I really like her at this point of time. I can do everything for her. I can be everything she want me to be. I like her so much. I maybe at this point so much, many times, though it all give me such as damn kind of pain.I never want that to repeat again. I just hate to be in that gloomy stage again.

Again, this will test my learnings on the past. Does I really learned or not? I badly wants this things to go my way, my plans. It such a wonderful time to feel that someone gives you the reason why you should be the best at all times. It such a great way to release all the pressures and burdens in your heart everytime I think of her. God really gave us the special meaning on how gifts aren’t always seen nor touch. Magic seems to be sparkled every time I’d close my eyes as I see her face. As i pray, that she would give me my best chances ever in my life, not again, but for the first time.

I’m willing to wait. As she gathers the thoughts of my best confessions to her. I am not disappointed on what I have said. I guess informality is the only thing I’ve done wrong. Guts seems to be again out of my element. But I swear to God. I like Ana so much, she gives me the best reason why I should be in this kind, in this place, and at this time. She makes my world turn differently rather than before. She’s the girl I really wanted. The eyes seems great. Attitude wise so okay, the charm, her sweetness completes her package.

If you just only know how much you mean to me right now as I wish I will always feel this kind. I’m so glad I really meet you. I wish there could be more time in the future as things go on and develops. I like you Ana so much. You mean very different for me, I know this is love. But history aren’t in favor of me. I learn so much, i wish I could do better right now. Im numb already for heartaches, I cannot wait for this time to come. I’m so immature before. I wish I already got the best remedies now. As I hope,By the end of this I will not say the word, I hated so much, the word, Again.

Excitement or Nervousness?

I'm waiting for this thing to happen for the last two years of my life here in college. after the angst of being stuck in there for 6 agonizing months, I get back. back with vengeance though. My greatest moments academically were happened this last year and so my downiest moments.

after a year I'm again on that moment reminiscing my frustrations. I know I'd expected too much for myself. I have a lot of better plans last year, but ended with a failure. But I know I shouldn't stop in here. I know everything will be okay in the future. for the meantime,just move on. Go on. Try again. God has his better plans for me, so better wait and live life into the fullest.

I never had them for two years right now. I don't know how should make my proper adjustments for me not to look awkward on their eyes. Am I still welcome or not? Should i talk to them just like before or not? Should i act parallel with my feelings or not? Oh! damn! It such a difficult thing to figure out. But I have bigger problem compare to “THEIR” than to “HER”.

I knew she make me feel worst upon saying those lines a year ago. But who am Ii to blame her. I am just a man who’d fell. Im just a man, and she’s the lady. Well feelings are already crush though I had another chance to redeem my long lost days. Will this be the right time for me? God, please give me some omens. I'm a bit nervous on how i work things out properly by this semester. Lot of things shall be settled though I don't know where should I start. I know Id still had the feelings for her. It never dies. but we are already okay in this kind. But i also know that I had another thing in my mind. And that is to pursue what I've started. Oh…give me signs please. I cant decide. I just cant.

We are good right now compare when I'M just a stranger to you last time. Should i take this opportunity for granted or not? Will I or Will ain't? whew! I'm excited to have a closer look at you for the next 6 months again but I'm also nervous that you don't want me close to you again for another half year of your college life.