What's better? Trying So Hard or Trying So Much?

Are all questions are made to be answered?


I'm quite incomplete for the last two weeks. I guess, even though it so early, I miss somebody. I miss my peers, the complicated world inside the school, the calculations, the estimations, and of course, I miss Her. I'm still like a unanswered final test paper. She just leave me in a blank. No trace of erasures, just full of frustrations. I told myself last night try not to be so "emo"; Try to be not bitter about it anymore. She's not for you. Almost had it, but not quite. I had all the chances but I still miss it. Had all the opportunities but I'd waste all of those. Had her in my life so close more than I'd expect it from the start. I just don't work things properly. I ain't able to balanced my debits and credits in my Life. I just again give so much part of me to someone I believe to be the right person. But no regrets, I want her so much, that's why I did. So what's my question that ain't answered? What did I done wrong? I just cannot think any foolish actions in the past. What's wrong on me? Why is it, when I tried so hard, it end always like this? Am I wrong? or they are? I guess I just can't differentiate anymore the meaning of trying so much compare to trying so hard. I'm more of the so hard type of person because come what may, the quality itself speaks for itself, in any aspects of our lives. I know, in many cases, We will try so many times for us to succeed or to achieve something we dream of, with the learning and sacrifices bestowed into us by our past, Someday it will come. It is just a matter of waiting. Just a matter of Time, as I again do hope, pray and wait.